Alright. I'm gonna do the ubiquitous "Blogger 101" list. Explainations of why are forthcoming.
1. I have gained a reputation for being an original thinker.
2. It's bullshit.
3. I am not an original thinker; I'm a person that recognizes good ideas and utilizes them to my best benefit.
4. I do not have a problem being wrong and will willingly admit when that's the case.
5. But you're gonna have to prove it to me first.
6. I'm EXTREMELY opinionated.
7. I do not mind when people disagree with me.
8. I mind GREATLY when they can't form a coherent argument as to WHY.
9. I am a "Grammar Nazi", for example...
10. I am the only person in my immediate family to have attended FEWER than 3 colleges.
11. I know when to use "fewer" and when to use "less".
12. I have a degree.
13. It actually makes it harder to get a job where I live.
14. I am the 2nd-most politically minded person I know.
15. My wife actually cares even more than I do.
16. I have a very high I.Q.
17. And a sometimes alarming lack of common sense.
18. I have a truly amazing wife.
19. I thank God, Allah, Buddha, Krishna, or whatever other higher force or being there is out there EVERY DAY that I met her.
20. I often think that all the difficulties I face in my life are the aforementioned higher force's way of evening out the score.
21. I love sports.
22. My degree is in Sport Management.
23. I own a small golf shop.
24. I am an experienced softball coach.
25. I've taught college classes in softball and baseball coaching.
26. I have all the native athletic ability of a moderately clumsy statue.
27. I still think life IS fair (for the most part anyway...)
28. I've watched almost every minute of every Detroit Lions game since 1981.
29. I know they tend to suck.
30. I love them anyway.
31. I love the Tigers even more.
32. Even though they're even worse.
33. I am moderately tall (6'1 1/2") and a bit on the skinny side (165).
34. I would HATE to be short.
35. I have an okay job.
36. With a great boss.
37. They're gonna need a crowbar to get me to leave.
38. I am a very messy person.
39. I'm also a bit lazy.
40. That's a horrible combination.
41. Thankfully, my wife's is up to the task of telling me when to clean up.
42. I have ADD.
43. I believe that most people forget that ADD is not an insult; it's a medical diagnosis, so there's no point being upset about it.
44. I am an avowed liberal.
45. I believe that our president is an imbecile and a hate-monger.
46. I firmly believe that everyone should be true to himself, regardless of what others may think about him or his lifestyle.
47. I assume that people who condemn other people because "the Bible says so," must also assume they're going to Hell because the Bible also says "Judge not, lest ye be judged."
48. I am very comfortable in my own skin.
49. I am descended from greatness, but if you ever met my grandfather, you already knew that.
50. I have an awesome family.
51. My Mom works with persons with disabilities.
52. My Dad teaches Jr. High. (Does adolescence count as a disability?)
53. My sister can be as irritating as the tag in your undershirt.
54. She is also one of the world's truly good people.
55. I have great in-laws.
56. They're WAY better to me than I deserve.
57. I'm a geek.
58. But not enough of one to be confident that someday I'll be running the world.
59. I love animals.
60. Except dogs.
61. The only 2 likeable dogs in the world have now passed on. (R.I.P. Cletus & Sage)
62. I also love kids.
63. I badly want to have my own.
64. But until I do, my wife and I will borrow them from parents who don't seem to get how lucky they are.
65. I gave my wife a shot last night.
66. I did not pass out, vomit, or do anything else to embarass myself.
67. I hope these shots help her get pregnant, because I really don't want to give any more than I absolutely have to.
68.I play piano.
69. But I can barely read music.
70. I also play harmonica.
71. We have a roommate.
72. He's a very good guy.
73. He's also slightly balding, which makes for an interesting tub situation.
74. I love to read.
75. But I'm picky.
76. I used to try to expand my horizons, but then I realized that nobody cared what I read, so I quit.
77. I'm in a golf league.
78. My partner has one of the world's ugliest swings.
79. He still plays better than me much of the time.
80. I badly want a Jeep.
81. For now, I'm getting my fix by trying to help my father-in-law to get his Jeep running.
82. I have a feeling that this isn't going to work in the long term.
83. I love to listen to the Al Franken show on Air America.
84. But I generally miss it because I have a job.
85. I listen to NPR news all the time.
86. It generally depresses me.
87. But it's still better than watching the local news, which makes me want to kill myself, because it's so bloody insipid.
88. I say "bloody" A LOT.
89. I wish I was British.
90. Even after the bombings.
91. I met my wife on the internet.
92. She impressed me with her turn of phrase.
93. We've been married for almost 5 years.
94. She still impresses me.
95. I have a sharp, sarcastic sense of humor.
96. But I still like puns.
97. I regard "Weird Al" Yankovic as a genius.
98. Randy Newman and Warren Zevon, too.
99. I have really great friends whom I wouldn't trade for anything.
100. I try to make sure they know who they are.
101. Hopefully they'll all read this and chuckle.
Laterz
